Oh man. I feel like I haven't used my brain in days. I am ready to go back to work--don't tell. I feel melancholic and increasingly brain dead. I think it's my bad Karma. Or maybe I'm shirking responsibility for my latest doltish exploit. Read on.
This week while I haven't gone to work, I've been watching TV or listening to talk radio several hours a day. I have to say, it caused me to applaud my own brilliance and superiority. "People spend their time watching this junk!" I think to myself as I channel surf and watch the drivel I condemned. All the morning shows are awful! How did these people get to be on television?: Kelly Ripa, Tony Danza, and I could go on into primetime TV with David Hasselhoff and Howie Mandel. The more aggravating thing is the ridiculous "drive-by media". I know without turning on the TV that daily news stories will include one or more segments on high gas prices and overweight/obese Americans. My IQ is dropping by the second. Then I hear poll after poll cited regarding the war in Iraq or the Dixie Chicks' latest album, and I think, "Why would I have any desire to hear the opinion of the average American? Have you been to Wal-Mart? It's a leper colony down there." The opinions of a bunch of uninformed, hysterical people do not constitute news.
Every dumb show I saw just made me feel empowered as a human being. I guess it was in this aura of self-righteousness that I went to the post office and dropped my latest Netflix rental into the post office box with no return envelope. I just cavalierly plopped the DVD in its little sleeve into the box, only noting that I had already missed the day's latest mail pickup time. I don't even know what excuses to make. The worst part is that I didn't realize what I had done until a few hours later, when I saw the little Netflix postage-paid return envelope next to my television. (Does my story make sense?) This is the kind of dumbness that thrusts me into a mid-life crisis. Inspired to examine my life, I'll commit to give up watching TV, get more sleep, read books, do yoga, etc. I did the same thing a few weeks ago when I lost my keys. It will probably last until the charge for the lost DVD comes through on my credit card, when having paid my debt, and hopefully redeemed myself into good Karma, I'll return to my slacker ways.
I love this news story about a three- or four-year-old Indian boy (News stories differ on his age.) who can run marathons. The news story is about a month old, but it's still hilarious.
You've gotta check out the story. This kid will be in the Guinness Book.
1 comment:
Awwww...I'm sorry about the Netflix rental. That stinks, but it sounds like something I would do. Did you have fun driving Scott around today?
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