I guess some like it hot

I can't believe it. My most favorite snarky single girl librarian blogger is engaged to be married. Where am I supposed to go for sarcastic spinster talk now? Another one bites the dust. The world needs a place for sharing nightmare blind date stories, set up attempts, and the well-meaning but outrageously rude comments that we singles get. Ah, the life. Why would anyone want to give that up? What the heck, let's perpetuate some more stereotypes!


I again resort to adding spice to my life through cooking. Trying a new recipe tonight: Vegan Chocolate Pepper Cookies. I'll let you know how they turn out.

Cookie Update: Mixed reviews. I liked licking the batter bowl better than eating the cookies. I added some ginger to half the batch, and that worked well. I am pretty sure that chipotle or some other type of chile pepper goes better with chocolate than black pepper. I'd make this cookie again with more ginger and no black pepper or a good dose of chipotle pepper.

Yada Yada Yada

Katie's birthday dinner was pretty good, yada yada yada, the quarter-life crisis Graham Cracker birthday cake wasn't. So much for trying to expand my horizons and find new recipe sources. The cake itself had a rather strange texture; Dad compared it to cornbread. My amendments to the whipped cream filling didn't turn out well. It was short on chocolate flavor and was an unappetizing grey color without the coffee. I ran out of time and didn't get to prettify sufficiently, either. Not a cake I'll be scrapbooking about. I am seeking a new hobby, but I don't think I'll sink to scrapbooking yet.

This F Minus comic totally reminded me of Taiwan, where the garbage man plays music like the ice cream man:

Quarterlife Crisis

Katie's the one having the birthday today, so how come I'm the one having the quarter-life crisis? It seems like the things I expect to make me happier usually do the opposite. Who was the goober that said something about happiness coming from the inside? Bob Loblaw? Also I'm a weirdo and nobody gets me. I think I'll go eat worms. No more philosophizing.

Katie's birthday cake: my take on this Graham Cracker Cake recipe from Great Cakes by Carole Walter. I'm changing the mocha whipped cream filling to cherry chocolate. I'm topping it with cherries instead of raspberries; Katie's not a fan of raspberries (blasphemy!), and maybe I'll put chocolate covered cherries around the perimeter or on the serving plates. I hear Porter likes those.

On the menu: Scott is grilling steaks and chicken. We're also having salad, baked potatoes, roasted corn, and 50 Yard Line Blueberry Muffins. Scott will probably also grill up some S'moritos. Never heard of them?

S'morito /smō'rē'tō/: a flour tortilla, spread with peanut butter, filled with mini marshmallows and mini chocolate chips, heated through in the microwave, in a skillet, or on a grill. Origin unknown: possibly Scout camp?

Chambored

Summer does terrible things to a baker. Who wants to turn on a 350º oven when it's already 100º out? Summer heat melts chocolate and turns fluffy buttercream frostings and whipped creams into sad puddles. Who wants to eat a heavy, sweet cake during swimsuit season?

What is there for me to do but dishes? Awful!

My sweet co-worker Kim gave me a bottle of Chambord yesterday. The bottle is so darn cute I didn't want to open it. But I ended up using a couple of tablespoons in a seasonally-appropriate recipe that doesn't require you to turn on the oven: Chocolate Raspberry Mousse. I'll grant that it is relatively rich and caloric for those of us who are trying to reduce, but you only need a couple of bites to feel satisfied. Another wonderful thing about this recipe is that in can be whipped up in half an hour, much quicker than your average layer cake + frosting. My upcoming plans for the Chambord include raspberry ice cream, chocolate truffles, and berry Tiramisu or trifle.



Chocolate-Raspberry Mousse
Cook's Illustrated | Makes 3 1/2 cups (6 to 8 servings)

ingredients

8 ounces bittersweet chocolate , chopped fine
2 tablespoons Cocoa powder , preferably Dutch-processed
1 teaspoon instant espresso powder
4 tablespoons water
2 tablespoons Chambord
2 large eggs , separated
1 tablespoon granulated sugar
1/8 teaspoon table salt
1 cup heavy cream , plus 2 more tablespoons (chilled)

preparation

1. Melt chocolate, cocoa powder, espresso powder, and water in medium heatproof bowl set over saucepan filled with 1 inch of barely simmering water, stirring frequently until smooth. Remove from heat and stir in Chambord.

2. Whisk egg yolks, 1 1/2 teaspoons sugar, and salt in medium bowl until mixture lightens in color and thickens slightly, about 30 seconds. Pour melted chocolate into egg mixture and whisk until thoroughly combined. Let cool until slightly warmer than room temperature, 3 to 5 minutes.

3. In clean bowl of standing mixer fitted with whisk attachment, beat egg whites at medium-low speed until frothy, 1 to 2 minutes. Add remaining 1 1/2 teaspoons sugar, increase mixer speed to medium-high, and beat until soft peaks form when whisk is lifted, about 1 minute. Detach whisk and bowl from mixer and whisk last few strokes by hand, making sure to scrape any unbeaten whites from bottom of bowl. Using whisk, stir about one-quarter of beaten egg whites into chocolate mixture to lighten it; gently fold in remaining egg whites with rubber spatula until a few white streaks remain.

4. Whip heavy cream at medium speed until it begins to thicken, about 30 seconds. Increase speed to high and whip until soft peaks form when whisk is lifted, about 15 seconds longer. Using rubber spatula, gently fold whipped cream into mousse until no white streaks remain. Spoon mousse into 6 to 8 individual serving dishes or goblets. Cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate until set and firm, at least 2 hours. (The mousse may be covered and refrigerated for up to 24 hours.) Serve mousse with fresh raspberries, if desired.

Tart it up

People will make the most bizarre and awful comments sometimes. I know I try my best.

The latest ones I've heard directed at me are something like: "When are you getting married?" "How do you feel about your younger sister getting married before you?" Blah blah... I smile wanly.

There was one Sunday night from an older gentleman: "I hear news about you," he said to me with a coy smile. I know this means he wants the dish on my love life.

I returned the coy smile and said, "Yes, I'm still around."

"I hear there's a social life." I expect this means that, thank goodness, I'm not sitting at home on the weekends crying into my ice cream any longer because I caught a man. But I'll take it as a "Congratulations, I'm so happy for you." Not that being in a relationship makes your social life more interesting. Isn't that the point of being in a relationship? You see the same person every time you go out. Not my definition of a swinging social life.

Then more of the "race your sister to the altar" talk came up. I'm going to start replying to that with "I'm waiting for the perfect man." Not that I'd be his type.



The lovely comment I got today concerned what a ridiculous idea it is for me to make Katie and Porter's wedding cake.

So tonight, I'm building fruit tarts with a vengeance.



Katie and Porter know that I will put all my effort into making a gorgeous and tasty cake. My plan is to bait guests at the reception by standing near the cake and accosting them with, "Oh man, do you see how that cake is leaning?" "Whoa, that cake is so dry!" and "That cake looks homemade."

Good times.

Singled Out

Some people are making a big deal out of the fact that we have a woman and a black man running for president as if they're of substandard stock and had to overcome a disability. Fortunately, there are not many social groups remaining that are implicitly or explicitly ostracized. Some of the groups that I can think of are rednecks, poor people, religious wackos, and single (unmarried) people, because you could make the argument that I qualify for inclusion in all those groups. Of those groups, I'd say the least likely to produce a US president from its membership is the unmarried crowd.

MSN Encarta says that James Buchanan, the 15th U.S. president, is the only unmarried man ever to be elected president. Buchanan was engaged to be married once; however, his fiancée died suddenly after breaking off the engagement, and he remained a bachelor all his life.

Imagine the media circus that would surround a single president today:

"Up next on Entertainment Tonight, is the president making eyes at the ambassador from Cordova?"

The chicks on The View carping, "Is the president wearing that off-the-shoulder number because she's meeting with the Elbonian leader today?"

Ann Curry reading the news that the president kissed the trade secretary hello.

National Enquirer headlines: "Which secret service agent gave the president the code name 'Hot Lips'?" alongside "Boy trapped in refrigerator eats own foot!"

As it is, this is my stance this year, hopefully minus the bad grammar:

Fusion Cuisine

Yesterday at the grocery store, I ran into one of my favorite couples, John and Sarah, who introduced me to Chet. I was shopping for last night's dinner ingredients, so we started talking about what we were each making for dinner. They asked me what I was making, and I hesitated a bit. As usual, I had cooked up a harebrained scheme, and I was a little embarrassed to reply with everything I had planned. Probably what is more embarrassing than reciting an overambitious menu is handing over a typed, printed menu and shopping list. They said, "What's the occasion?" I should have said that we eat weird stuff like this all the time.
Menu:
Roasted Red Pepper Goat Cheese Quesadillas with Basil Pesto

Grilled Beef Filet
Seared Scallops with Pancetta over Avocado and Wasabi
Roasted Corn Salsa

Mexican Vanilla Ice Cream
Chipotle Chocolate Sauce
Spicy Peanut Brittle


Dinner and a movie suggestion: El Laberinto del Fauno / Pan's Labyrinth.

Opinion Piece

Details on the Jenna Bush Hager wedding that took place this weekend are limited. I just want to know the specs on the wedding cake. Looks like tall cake layers with white buttercream frosting spread in broad vertical strokes, atop a floral base, decorated with a few flowers on each tier. I wonder what flavor the cake and filling were. What think ye? I think the cake has a beautiful simplicity.

(Does anyone else think Henry looks a little like a young George Bush in this photo?)

Mudder's Day

In my opinion, Mother's Day is a great foodie holiday. It's a great chance to spoil your mother with a homemade meal or take her out for a nice brunch or buy (or make) chocolates for her. Dads are fine with a slab of meat thrown on the grill - how barbaric! - but moms need something more refined, with subtle flavor notes echoing through various courses. It may be the day for something dainty, like a quiche, which Dad claims is women food, or chocolate-dipped fruit, or Eggs Benedict, which has been one of our regular Mother's Day entrées. Since Eggs Benedict moved to a Christmas tradition, I got to be more creative with the menu:
Mother's Day Menu:
Romaine Salad with Vinaigrette
Rosemary Focaccia
Roast Turkey Breast with Orange and Rosemary
Orange Glazed Carrots
Roasted Red Potatoes
Spring Flower Cake


Roast Turkey Breast with Orange and Rosemary
recipe from Cook's Illustrated
Serves 8 to 10

4 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened
3 medium garlic cloves, minced
1 tablespoon minced fresh rosemary
1 teaspoon grated orange zest
1 teaspoon red pepper flakes
3/4 teaspoon table salt
1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
1 whole turkey breast (6 to 7 pounds), bone-in and skin-on
1 cup water, plus more if needed

1. Adjust oven rack to middle position and heat oven to 425 degrees. Trim turkey of excess fat and pat dry with paper towels. Mix butter, garlic, rosemary, orange zest, red pepper flakes, salt, and pepper in medium bowl with rubber spatula until thoroughly combined. Carefully separate turkey skin from meat over breast; avoid breaking skin.

2. Work butter mixture under skin on both sides of breast and rub skin of turkey to evenly distribute butter over breast. Spray V-rack with nonstick cooking spray and set inside large roasting pan. Place turkey in rack with skin side facing up; pour water into roasting pan.

3. Roast turkey for 30 minutes. Reduce oven temperature to 325 degrees. Continue to roast turkey until thickest part of breast registers 160 degrees on instant-read thermometer, about 1 hour longer. Transfer turkey to carving board and let rest for 20 minutes. Carve and serve.

I'll have to keep that recipe around for Thanksgiving. Everyone also liked the Rosemary Focaccia, even though the recipe cheats and calls for refrigerated pizza dough. I secretly hate it when people compliment my cooking when I use shortcuts, because it makes me wonder why I usually spend my time mincing, chopping, and otherwise making meals from scratch. The Spring Flower Cake is from the Martha Stewart Living March 2008 issue. It is a vanilla-flavored bundt cake, which is glazed with an orange syrup. It's served with a honey mousse and crystallized edible flowers.

I know you think your mom is the best, but I say my mom is the best, and I'm never wrong.

Chèvre Chocolate Truffles

Goat Cheese Chocolate Truffles
Gourmet | October 1993

Makes about 25 truffles.

ingredients

6 ounces fine-quality bittersweet chocolate (not unsweetened), chopped
6 ounces (about 3/4 cup) fresh goat cheese
2 tablespoons confectioners' sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1/8 teaspoon pure lemon extract
1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder, sifted, for coating the truffles

preparation

In a metal bowl set over a pan of barely simmering water melt the chocolate, stirring until it is smooth, remove the bowl from the pan, and let the chocolate cool slightly. In a bowl whisk together the goat cheese, the confectioners' sugar, the vanilla, and the lemon extract until the mixture is light and fluffy, whisk in the chocolate until the mixture is combined well, and chill the mixture, covered, for 1 hour, or until it is firm. Form heaping teaspoons of the mixture into balls and roll the balls in the cocoa powder. Chill the truffles on a baking sheet lined with waxed paper for 30 minutes, or until they are firm. The truffles keep in an airtight container, chilled, for 3 days.

I used Callebaut 60% bittersweet chocolate and a small round of plain Haute Goat Creamery cheese. It's easier to (carefully) melt the chocolate in the microwave, heating and stirring it at 30-second intervals. I left out the lemon extract. For dusting the truffles, I used Dutch-process cocoa instead of unsweetened, and I added some cinnamon and chipotle powder to the cocoa. On a second batch I tried adding Kahlua before shaping and those truffles were delicious. It was also easier to incorporate the cheese and chocolate with a spatula instead of a whisk, since the mixture tends to get stuck in the whisk loops. There are dozens of ways to customize this recipe to your liking. Suggestions: use a flavored cheese, like fig, orange, or jalapeño, instead of plain. Change the ratio of cheese to chocolate and/or adjust powdered sugar to taste. Experiment with liqueurs, e.g., add Kahlua and roll the truffles in espresso powder; add Frangelico and roll them in toasted hazelnuts; add Kirsch and chopped dried cherries; add coconut extract or coconut rum and roll them in coconut.