July 16, 2009

Goober Grape

Have you ever tried Smucker's Goober Grape? My grandparents always had a stock of the stuff when I was little, and I often requested a Goober Grape sandwich. Peanut butter and jelly out of the same jar? It blew my mind. I still think it must take a little bit of magic to get that peanut butter and jelly swirled into the jar so beautifully. But I tried a bite of the stuff today and was quickly reminded that going to the trouble of opening two separate jars is a better option. There's something not quite right about that peanut butter. I assume it takes some crazy additives to keep the peanut butter from mixing with the jelly in the jar.

Speaking of goobers, here are some more highlights from the recent editions of the BYU police beat. One of these made me laugh until I cried, but then, I'm easily amused.

Police Beat for June 28

FIREARMS

June 16: Someone reported seeing a man in the stadium with a rifle. The police responded and found out it was a grounds employee sent to eliminate pigeons with a pellet gun. Officers stopped him. The man was not able to shoot any pigeons.

ANIMAL PROBLEMS

June 18: A skinny brown snake was reported by the stairs at 800 N. 300 East. When police arrived, no snake was found.

June 20: A stray cat fell into a mechanical well and couldn’t get out. Officers responded and rescued the cat.

June 24: Concerned people reported someone chasing a duck around Maeser Hill with a motor scooter. Officers responded to the call and told the person not to harass ducks. The person complied.

Police Beat for July 7

July 3: Officers responded to a suspicious person at the Bookstore upset about the deodorant selection. The person picked up a stick of deodorant, kicked it across the floor, then paid for the deodorant and left.

Police Beat for July 14

SUSPICIOUS ACTIVITY

July 8: A suspicious blue canvas bag was reported in the NICB. Police responded and found it contained a water polo ball and a towel.

ANIMAL PROBLEMS

July 4: An owl was found in the former president’s Home. An officer communicated with the owl and it left.

July 6: An injured bird was reported on campus. An officer helped the bird into a pine tree.

DISORDERLY CONDUCT

July 4: Several people in the parking lot of LaVell Edwards Stadium during the Stadium of Fire got into a heated argument. Police arrived and were able to calm them down.

July 9: Six individuals were reported dropping things off the southwest campus bridge at 12:30 a.m. They were found to just be waving towels over the edge.

7 comments:

Frank said...

I wonder what the officer said to the owl.

jojoba said...

police beat, reader's forum, and puzzles: the best parts of the Daily Universe

Steve said...

I've found that whereas pigeons are stubborn to the point that pellet guns are required to get them to leave, owls can be persuaded with some cold hard rational and logical reasoning, at which point, the owl will concede the validity of your argument and politely depart.

However, I'm afraid I have no advice for dealing with a disgruntled deodorant purchaser.

Kimberly said...

Hoo hoo. Shoo shoo.

Steve said...

Boo.

Auntie said...

It took SOME NERVE to goose a motorscooter around a duck.

larshannon said...

We bought a jar of that stuff for camp-out sandwiches. You know it made an "impression" because my four year old reminds me daily that he wants his pbj sandwiches "without peanut butter and jelly stuck together." It has been 3 months since the Goober sandwich. Think the requests will end soon?